Groesbeek, view of the 'National Liberation Museum 1944-1945' in Groesbeek. © Ton Kersten
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Posts tagged as humor

Ode to the Haggis

2012-10-26 (129) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor

Hendrik Jan Thomassen not only sent me the tail of Haggis hunting but also a nice ancient poem as an ode to Haggis.

Here it is:

The haggis season has begun
and all over Scotland every gun
Is taken down with loving care
Though some prefer the haggis snare
The haggis are a wiley lot
That's why they are so seldom shot

Then hidden in the highland heather
Great hairy Clansmen crouch together
And having laid the haggis bait,
a life-like haggis on a plate,
One cries out loudly: ''There's the noo''
Which means the haggis are in view

It's flying upside down and low
The guns all fore but they're too slow
For thought it's rather old and fat
They're awful hard to hit like that

And as it flies off into the mist
Great hairy clansmen shake their fists
Scream their curseds to the crags
Stamp on empty haggis bags
And so the haggis get away
to live until next Christmas day
''Come back haggis''

And that's the reason it is so rare
This strange traditional Scottish fare

We're that haggis hi hooray
It's hog'manay not Christmas day

How to hunt the Haggis

2012-10-22 (128) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor

Most people are familiar with my love of Scotland, single malt and (of course) haggis. But most people do not have a clue what haggis is and when you tell them, they walk out in disgust.

But a colleague of mine found out that haggis is just an animal that can be hunted in the Scottish Highlands.

This is how it's done:

.....asked me how the haggis were hunted so I explained that there were two types of haggis, who, because they lived on the steep slopes of the Scottish Highlands, developed legs of different lengths on their left and right sides depending upon which way they travelled round the mountain to graze. With the knowledge of which type of haggis one was hunting, the procedure was quite simple.

A large 'catch fence' was erected around the base of the mountain and a piper was sent up the mountain to play his bagpipes while walking contrary to the normal direction of rotation of the haggis. This put the fear of G*d in to the wee creatures who tried to run away, but of course their short legs were now down-hill so they soon overbalanced and rolled down the mountain into the catch fence at the base where they were then easily caught and euthanized.

Thanks to Hendrik Jan Thomassen.

Those funny technicians

2011-06-30 (99) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor

I hope the work is done more serious as the reporting.

Check report

Finally a captcha I can read

2011-03-05 (90) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor

I found this one on Quantum Random Bit Generator Service. I think they are geniuses.

They do have a lot more of these. Just refresh your browser.

Being bored

2010-10-22 (75) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor

Every once in while everybody gets bored a bit. And what does a nerd/geek do when bored? Yes, he will write a bogus man page for some non-existing Linux feature.

Read my man page about the happy yes device.

Read more »

Buy nice packaging

2010-09-16 (71) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor, news

On the German eBay i found a lot of these.

Buy my iPod/iPhone/etc packaging. Nothing in it, just the box.

I still have got a lot of them in the attic, so maybe I should open an eBay account smiley

First shot

Second shot

My Coffee Addiction

2010-07-20 (52) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor

Google can tell time?

2010-07-20 (51) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor

Today I made a 'cut and paste' error and ended up Googling for the word "Time". This is not a great deal, but the result surprised me:

Google Time

They even know where I am!!

Entering things like "Time India" even gave the correct results. Nice.

I'm a coffee addict

2010-07-19 (50) by Ton Kersten, tagged as humor